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▲+1100▼
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes?
Cashew!
3326 votes · ·
▲+1083▼
How do you catch a bra?
With a booby trap!
2453 votes · ·
▲+1057▼
How did the frog die?
He Kermit suicide!
4115 votes · ·
▲+1053▼
A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up, and the doctor tells him: "You need to stop masturbating."
"Why?" the man asks. The doctor replies: "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
2551 votes · ·
▲+1022▼
How many lives does a Nazi cat have?
Nien!
3368 votes · ·
▲+1020▼
Knock knock.
Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
3799 votes · ·
▲+991▼
Did you hear about that new movie called "Constipation"?
No? That's because it hasn't come out yet...
2217 votes · ·
▲+940▼
What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam.
2628 votes · ·
▲+933▼
I'm really starting to hate these stupid little Russian Dolls.
They're so full of themselves!
2121 votes · ·
▲+932▼
What does a clock do when it's hungry?
It goes back four seconds!
3376 votes · ·
▲+919▼
The Past, The Present and The Future walked into a bar.
It was tense!
2287 votes · ·
▲+917▼
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
You're too young to be smoking!
2623 votes · ·
▲+912▼
Helen Keller walks into a bar...
then a chair, then the wall.
2848 votes · ·
▲+911▼
Why does Piglet smell?
Because he plays with Pooh.
2133 votes · ·
▲+885▼
Parallel lines have so much in common.
It's a shame they're never gonna meet.
2061 votes · ·

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