Clean Jokes About Holidays | Good Bad Jokes

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?
He felt his presents!
1820 votes · ·
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What does Miley Cyrus eat on Thanksgiving?
Twerkey!
2232 votes · ·
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What's a good pasta to make on Friday the 13th?
Fettuccine Afraid-O!
1 vote · ·
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What kind of key can't open doors?
A turkey!
1 vote · ·
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Murray.Murray who?
Murray Christmas!
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What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi!
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Why was the snowman looking through a bag of carrots?
He was picking his nose!
2 votes · ·
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Ho-ho.Ho-ho who?
You know, your Santa impression could really use some work.
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Where does the Easter Bunny get his eggs?
From Eggplants!
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Why do we paint Easter eggs?
Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!
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Why did the Easter egg hide?
Because he was a little chicken!
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Why don't mathematicians fear Friday the 13th?
Because they know it's just another irrational fear!
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What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?
The casse-role!
1 vote · ·
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Knock Knock.
Who's there? Tamara. Tamara who? Tamara we'll have turkey leftovers!
1 vote · ·
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Where does Frosty keep his cash?
In the snow banks!
1878 votes · ·

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