318 Dad Jokes that will leave you grounded.

• ▲+685▼

  Why don't dinosaurs talk?

  Because they're dead.

  2925 votes · Copy

• ▲+1136▼

  How do you feel when there is no coffee?

  Depresso.

  2442 votes · Copy

• ▲+425▼

  What does a baby computer call his father?

  Data!

  2163 votes · Copy

• ▲-499▼

  What's green and sings?

  Elvis Parsley!

  2009 votes · Copy

• ▲+526▼

  Why should you never make fun of a fat girl with a lisp?

  Because she's probably thick and tired of it!

  2294 votes · Copy

• ▲+673▼

  Jokes about menstruation just aren't funny.

  Period.

  2523 votes · Copy

• ▲+246▼

  What did the pony say when he sang with a sore throat?

  Sorry, I'm just a little hoarse!

  1602 votes · Copy

• ▲+27▼

  What didn't the melons get married?

  Because they cantaloupe!

  2225 votes · Copy

• ▲+62▼

  What would bears be without bees?

  Ears!

  1704 votes · Copy

• ▲-373▼

  Did you hear about the circus fire?

  It was intense!

  2157 votes · Copy

• ▲-155▼

  Why did Captain Kirk's wife have a turd on her head?

  Because William Shatner!

  1993 votes · Copy

• ▲+549▼

  What did the overly excited gardner do when spring finally arrived?

  He wet his plants!

  1893 votes · Copy

• ▲+939▼

  What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

  Dam.

  2627 votes · Copy

• ▲-163▼

  Two cows are standing in a field.

  One cow says "MOOOOO!" The other cow says pretty much the same thing.

  2537 votes · Copy

• ▲+910▼

  Why does Piglet smell?

  Because he plays with Pooh.

  2132 votes · Copy