318 Dad Jokes that will leave you grounded.

• ▲+991▼

  Did you hear about that new movie called "Constipation"?

  No? That's because it hasn't come out yet...

  2217 votes · Copy

• ▲+684▼

  How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?

  He felt his presents!

  1820 votes · Copy

• ▲0▼

  Knock knock.

  Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? ಠ_ಠ 💩

  0 votes · Copy

• ▲+185▼

  Knock knock.

  Who's there? To. To who? To *whom*

  1748 votes · Copy

• ▲-120▼

  Two guys walk into a bar…

  The third guy ducks.

  2762 votes · Copy

• ▲+614▼

  What did one hat say to another?

  You stay here, I'll go on a head!

  1988 votes · Copy

• ▲-586▼

  What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding?

  Thanks for the mammaries!

  1564 votes · Copy

• ▲-396▼

  What did the ghost say to the bee?

  Boo bee!

  2044 votes · Copy

• ▲+392▼

  What did the mother Buffalo say when her boy left for college?

  Bye Son!

  1774 votes · Copy

• ▲+446▼

  What do clouds wear under their shorts?

  Thunderpants

  1834 votes · Copy

• ▲+479▼

  What do you call a blind dinosaur?

  Doyouthinkhesaurus

  2109 votes · Copy

• ▲-407▼

  What does a Mexican put under his carpet?

  Underlay! Underlay!

  1797 votes · Copy

• ▲+454▼

  What does a vegan zombie eat?

  Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!!

  1770 votes · Copy

• ▲+448▼

  What do you call a guy who never farts in public?

  A Private Tutor!

  1926 votes · Copy

• ▲+469▼

  What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?

  Roberto

  2859 votes · Copy