318 Dad Jokes that will leave you grounded.

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  What do you call a deer with no eyes?

  Noideer!

  1 vote · Copy

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  What are caterpillars afraid of?

  Dogerpillers!

  0 votes · Copy

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  I quit my job after what the boss said to me.

  What did he say? Youre fired!

  1 vote · Copy

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  What did the dwarf say to the pint of beer?

  I could drink you under the table!

  0 votes · Copy

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  An inebriated dwarf stumbles into a bar.

  Dwarf: Hey, barkeep, a pint of beer pease. Bartender: Sorry mate, I cant serve you. Dwarf: Why not? Bartender: Because you're a little drunk!

  0 votes · Copy

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  What do you call someone with 6 eyes, 2 mouths and 3 ears?

  Ugly!

  2 votes · Copy

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  Why was the snowman looking through a bag of carrots?

  He was picking his nose!

  1 vote · Copy

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  Whats the difference between the Starship Enterprise and toilet paper?

  Nothing, they both orbit Uranus wiping out Klingons!

  0 votes · Copy

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  Why did the blind man fall In the well?

  Because he couldn’t see that well!

  1 vote · Copy

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  What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek?

  You crack me up!

  1 vote · Copy

• ▲0▼

  There are 3 types of people in this world…

  Those that are good at Math and those that are not.

  2 votes · Copy

• ▲0▼

  Why did the golfer change his pants?

  Because he got a hole in one!

  0 votes · Copy

• ▲-607▼

  What do you get when you combine a rhetorical question and a joke?

  1617 votes · Copy

• ▲+151▼

  My girlfriend says she needs time and distance.

  Is she calculating velocity?

  729 votes · Copy

• ▲-127▼

  My doctor said he's been practicing for 30 years.

  When will he start doing his job for real?

  731 votes · Copy