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Why do ducks have feathers on their tails?
To cover their butt quacks!
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Why is the Easter Bunny a great brewer?
Because he knows a lot about hops.
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When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it's full groan!
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Did you hear the guy who invented the wind chill factor died yesterday?
He was 87, but only felt 75.
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Why did the French chef put on sweatpants?
He wanted to get confit!
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What’s a dog’s favorite band?
Styx!
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What do you call a cop in bed?
A pig in a blanket!
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Why was the constipated accountant fired?
He couldn't budget.
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How come nobody at the king's table laughed when he farted?
Because noble gases don't cause reactions!
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What did the 85-year-old say to a woman at a senior’s dance?
So, do I come here often?
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A clown is eating 2 cannibals.
"Who tastes funny now?" said the clown.
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How does the moon cut its hair?
Eclipse it.
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What do you get when you cross a penis with a potato?
A dic-tater!
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How does the solar system hold up its pants?
With an asteroid belt.
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How do you organize a party in outer space?
You planet.
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