22 Short Story Jokes — Worth the Setup | Good Bad Jokes

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Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say "Bach bach bach!"
3816 votes · ·
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And Jesus said, "Come forth and receive everlasting life!"
But John came fifth, and only received a toaster oven.
2359 votes · ·
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A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up, and the doctor tells him: "You need to stop masturbating."
"Why?" the man asks. The doctor replies: "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
2563 votes · ·
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Two bananas are lying on a riverbank when a turd goes floating by.
The turd yells to the bananas, "hey guys, come on in, the water feels great!" One banana looks at the other banana and says, "do you believe that shit?"
2207 votes · ·
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You hear the one about the three holes in the ground filled with water?
No? Well, well, well....
2079 votes · ·
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A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch.
He picks it up and throws it across the street. A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch. The snail looks up and says, "What the fuck was *that* all about!?"
2109 votes · ·
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Two muffins were sitting in an oven.
One turned to the other and said "Hey, it's pretty hot in here, isn't it?" The other turned and shouted "Oh my god a talking muffin!"
2539 votes · ·
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A Mobius strip sits down at a bar, looking miserable. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?"
And the Mobius strip says, "Where do I start?"
4 votes · ·
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A weasel walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
4 votes · ·
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Do your socks have holes in them?
No. Then how'd you get your feet in them?
3 votes · ·
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A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.
The rabbit says, "I think I'm a typo".
5 votes · ·
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
To visit the idiot. ..... Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken!
2 votes · ·
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Doctor: “Sir, your test results show that your DNA is backwards.”
Patient: “AND?!”
2 votes · ·
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Customer: "Waiter, my soup is cold."
Waiter: "It's Gazpacho, sir. Gazpacho, my soup is cold."
3 votes · ·
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1, 2, and 3 walk into a bar. 2 asks for a drink.
"You're mean," says the bartender.
3 votes · ·

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