Top Rated Animals Jokes | Good Bad Jokes

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Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say "Bach bach bach!"
3812 votes · ·
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My grandad has the heart of a lion…
…and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
2704 votes · ·
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What is a duck's favourite drug?
Quack!
2842 votes · ·
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What did the Lion King tell Simba when he was walking too slow?
Mufasa!
3910 votes · ·
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How did the frog die?
He Kermit suicide!
4113 votes · ·
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How many lives does a Nazi cat have?
Nien!
3368 votes · ·
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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam.
2627 votes · ·
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Two bananas are lying on a riverbank when a turd goes floating by.
The turd yells to the bananas, "hey guys, come on in, the water feels great!" One banana looks at the other banana and says, "do you believe that shit?"
2197 votes · ·
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What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
1908 votes · ·
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A man goes into the hospital with 6 plastic horses up his bum.
The doctors described his condition as stable.
1826 votes · ·
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Why don't dinosaurs talk?
Because they're dead.
2925 votes · ·
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Why cant zoo animals take tests?
There are too many cheetahs!
3269 votes · ·
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What do you call an alligator that wears a vest?
An investigator.
2724 votes · ·
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What did the perverted frog say?
"Rubbit"
2054 votes · ·
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What do you give a sick bird?
Tweetment.
1964 votes · ·

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