Top Rated Animals Jokes | Good Bad Jokes

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Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say "Bach bach bach!"
3816 votes · ·
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My grandad has the heart of a lion…
…and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
2714 votes · ·
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What is a duck's favourite drug?
Quack!
2845 votes · ·
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What did the Lion King tell Simba when he was walking too slow?
Mufasa!
3913 votes · ·
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How did the frog die?
He Kermit suicide!
4116 votes · ·
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How many lives does a Nazi cat have?
Nien!
3370 votes · ·
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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam.
2633 votes · ·
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Two bananas are lying on a riverbank when a turd goes floating by.
The turd yells to the bananas, "hey guys, come on in, the water feels great!" One banana looks at the other banana and says, "do you believe that shit?"
2208 votes · ·
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What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
1912 votes · ·
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A man goes into the hospital with 6 plastic horses up his bum.
The doctors described his condition as stable.
1827 votes · ·
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Why don't dinosaurs talk?
Because they're dead.
2927 votes · ·
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Why cant zoo animals take tests?
There are too many cheetahs!
3273 votes · ·
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What do you call an alligator that wears a vest?
An investigator.
2725 votes · ·
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What did the perverted frog say?
"Rubbit"
2066 votes · ·
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What do you give a sick bird?
Tweetment.
1967 votes · ·

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