295 Dad Jokes Puns | Good Bad Jokes

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What's a good pasta to make on Friday the 13th?
Fettuccine Afraid-O!
4 votes · ·
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A three legged dog walks into a bar and says,
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
2 votes · ·
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What do you call flat Mountain Dew?
Plateau Dew!
2 votes · ·
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What kind of kebabs are eaten in libraries?
Shush Kebabs!
4 votes · ·
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What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
2 votes · ·
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How does the solar system hold up its pants?
With an asteroid belt.
2 votes · ·
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Why was the constipated accountant fired?
He couldn't budget.
2 votes · ·
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What do you call fairy tales told really, really quickly?
ASAP's fables!
10 votes · ·
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What do you call a person who eats other people slowly?
A cannibble!
8 votes · ·
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My doctor told me I have the peekaboo virus.
She sent me straight to the ICU!
4 votes · ·
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What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It’s a pain in the neck!
3 votes · ·
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My wife asked me if I had seen the dog bowl.
I said, "No, but I've seen him play golf!"
1 vote · ·
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What do you call a skunk with a laser blaster?
Pepe le pew pew pew! (Sorry this joke stinks.)
1 vote · ·
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I used to hate facial hair…
but then it grew on me!
3 votes · ·
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Why should you never eat a clock?
It’s too time consuming!
3 votes · ·

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