495 Top Rated Jokes — Voted Best by Our Readers | Good Bad Jokes

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Knock knock.
Who's there?Murray.Murray who?
Murray Christmas!
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What do you get when you cross a penis with a potato?
A dic-tater!
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Why are dogs bad at dancing?
They have two left feet!
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What do you call a dog with no back legs and balls of steel?
Sparky!
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Moustache.Moustache who?
I moustache you something, but I'll shave it for later.
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What kind of frog is part Polish?
A tadpole!
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Why should you always knock before opening the refrigerator?
Because there might be an Italian dressing!
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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
Zero.
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What do you call a large animal from Africa that lets its hair grow?
A hippy-potamus!
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Why can't you hear a psychiatrist go to the bathroom?
Because the 'P' is silent!
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Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper?
He sold his soul to Santa!
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Cash.Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer peanuts.
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My wife gave me an ultimatum: it's either her, or my addiction to sweets…
The decision was a piece of cake!
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Our wedding was so beautiful…
even the cake was in tiers!
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What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
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