418 Top Rated Jokes — Voted Best by Our Readers | Good Bad Jokes

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What do you do when your shoes get holes in them?
Reboot!
1 vote · ·
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What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?
The casse-role!
1 vote · ·
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Why did the blind man fall into the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well!
1 vote · ·
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I'm not saying that cosmetic surgery cured my depression…
But it definitely put a smile on my face.
1 vote · ·
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If you were to clean a vacuum, would you be a vacuum cleaner?
1494 votes · ·
▲-12▼
What's the best time to go to the dentist?
Tooth Hurty!
2638 votes · ·
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What did the wall say to the ceiling?
I'll meet you at the corner.
2099 votes · ·
▲-45▼
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
3487 votes · ·
▲-78▼
What is the number one cause of divorce?
Marriage!
4426 votes · ·
▲-120▼
Two guys walk into a bar…
The third guy ducks.
2762 votes · ·
▲-127▼
My doctor said he's been practicing for 30 years.
When will he start doing his job for real?
731 votes · ·
▲-148▼
How many Freudians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw in the light bulb, and one to hold the penis. I mean the ladder. One to hold the ladder.
1884 votes · ·
▲-152▼
I heard Mars has no atmosphere.
Could we create an atmosphere by dimming the lights and playing smooth jazz?
742 votes · ·
▲-155▼
Why did Captain Kirk's wife have a turd on her head?
Because William Shatner!
1993 votes · ·
▲-163▼
Two cows are standing in a field.
One cow says "MOOOOO!" The other cow says pretty much the same thing.
2537 votes · ·

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