119 Actually Funny Animal Jokes That Are Paws-itively Funny | Good Bad Jokes

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My grandad has the heart of a lion…
…and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
2710 votes · ·
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Why don't blind people go skydiving?
Because it scares their dogs too much.
2522 votes · ·
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What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
1910 votes · ·
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Why do penguins walk softly?
Because they can't walk hardly.
1805 votes · ·
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What did the ghost say to the bee?
Boo bee!
2046 votes · ·
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Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because gorillas have big fingers.
2159 votes · ·
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What is invisible and smells like carrots?
Rabbit farts
2420 votes · ·
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What did the mother Buffalo say when her boy left for college?
Bye Son!
1775 votes · ·
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What did the perverted frog say?
"Rubbit"
2056 votes · ·
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A panda walks into a bar and says to the bartender: "Can I get a ...... Martini?"
The bartender replies: "Why the big paws?"
1921 votes · ·
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A man went to the zoo.
All they had to exhibit was a dog. It was a shih tzu.
3084 votes · ·
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A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch.
He picks it up and throws it across the street. A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch. The snail looks up and says, "What the fuck was *that* all about!?"
2103 votes · ·
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What do you call a blind dinosaur?
Doyouthinkhesaurus
2111 votes · ·
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So a seal walks into a club...
5191 votes · ·

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