256 of The Best Dad Jokes on the Internet | Good Bad Jokes

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What’s the award for being the best dentist?
A little plaque!
3 votes · ·
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What kind of key can't open doors?
A turkey!
1 vote · ·
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When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
1 vote · ·
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What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek?
You crack me up!
1 vote · ·
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Why don't mathematicians fear Friday the 13th?
Because they know it's just another irrational fear!
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All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together.
At first it's boring, then it's riveting.
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An inebriated dwarf stumbles into a bar.
Dwarf: Hey, barkeep, a pint of beer pease. Bartender: Sorry mate, I cant serve you. Dwarf: Why not? Bartender: Because you're a little drunk!
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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil!
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Great food, but no atmosphere!
0 votes · ·
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Did you hear the rumor about butter?
Well, I'm not going to spread it!"
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How do lawyers say goodbye?
We'll be suing ya!
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I like mountains…
But volcanoes are ash holes.
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I'm not worried about the moon getting too full
It's just a phase!
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I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
It's impossible to put down!
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Is this pool safe for diving?
It deep ends!
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