379 of The Best Puns — Groan-Worthy and Proud | Good Bad Jokes

▲+3076▼
I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin' all day!
5779 votes · ·
▲+2711▼
A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3.
He says, "Uno, dos..." and then *poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
5249 votes · ·
▲+2468▼
What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.
The guardians of the galaxy!
5918 votes · ·
▲+2443▼
I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.
It's something I could really see myself doing!
4458 votes · ·
▲+2311▼
Why are there fences around a graveyard?
Because people are dying to get in!
4871 votes · ·
▲+2157▼
Two satellites decided to get married.
The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
3895 votes · ·
▲+2112▼
What do you call a belt made out of watches?
A waist of time!
4462 votes · ·
▲+1873▼
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock knock joke?
He won the "no-bell" prize!
4087 votes · ·
▲+1810▼
What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?
Snow balls!
4038 votes · ·
▲+1790▼
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was outstanding in his field!
3738 votes · ·
▲+1746▼
Knock knock.
Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
3410 votes · ·
▲+1736▼
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but their flag is a huge plus.
3562 votes · ·
▲+1670▼
Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say "Bach bach bach!"
3816 votes · ·
▲+1559▼
How did the hipster burn his mouth?
He sipped his coffee before it was cool!
3685 votes · ·
▲+1500▼
Does anyone need an ark?
I Noah guy.
3084 votes · ·

« Prev12 3 4 5…26 Next »

Displaying Joke 1 – 15 of 379 in total