371 of The Best Puns — Groan-Worthy and Proud | Good Bad Jokes

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Did you hear about that new movie called "Constipation"?
No? That's because it hasn't come out yet...
2217 votes · ·
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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam.
2628 votes · ·
▲+933▼
I'm really starting to hate these stupid little Russian Dolls.
They're so full of themselves!
2121 votes · ·
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What does a clock do when it's hungry?
It goes back four seconds!
3376 votes · ·
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The Past, The Present and The Future walked into a bar.
It was tense!
2287 votes · ·
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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
You're too young to be smoking!
2623 votes · ·
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What do you do when there's a sink standing outside your door?
You let that sink in.
3274 votes · ·
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Why didn’t the lifeguard save the hippie?
Because he was too far out!
3334 votes · ·
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What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
José and Hose B.
2255 votes · ·
▲+807▼
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
3559 votes · ·
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How does Moses make his tea?
Hebrews it!
2707 votes · ·
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What are a ninja's favourite type of shoes?
Sneakers!
2281 votes · ·
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What do you call two guys from Mexico playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
1971 votes · ·
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What happens when you witness a ship wreck?
You let it sink in.
2269 votes · ·
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What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
1908 votes · ·

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