495 Top Rated Jokes — Voted Best by Our Readers | Good Bad Jokes

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What did the man say when he lost his truck?
Where's my truck?!
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Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn't matter what you call them, they ain't coming!
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Why does a dog lick his nuts?
Because he can!
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Hike.Hike who?
I didn't know you liked Japanese poetry!
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How does the moon cut its hair?
Eclipse it.
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Why did Chewbacca crash the Millennium Falcon the first time he flew it?
It was a Wookiee mistake!
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Why don’t mummies take time off?
They’re afraid to unwind!
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Why can't you starve in a desert?
Because of all the sand which is there!
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Why can't the Buddhist vacuum under the sofa?
Because he has no attachments!
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Why do we paint Easter eggs?
Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!
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What's worse than Friday the 13th?
Monday the whatever.
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What time do you go to the dentists?
Whatever time they book you in.
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I was walking my dog through a graveyard this morning and waved at the groundskeeper. "Morning!" he called.
"No mate", I replied. "Just walking the dog."
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I just found out I'm colorblind.
The diagnosis came completely out of the purple!
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