398 Clean Jokes — Safe for Any Crowd | Good Bad Jokes

▲+127▼
What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo?
Ones really heavy, and the other's a little lighter!
1809 votes · ·
▲+110▼
What do you call someone else's cheese?
Nacho Cheese!
1802 votes · ·
▲+110▼
What's brown and sticky?
A stick
3898 votes · ·
▲+105▼
What's brown and rhymes with snoop?
Dr. Dre
2471 votes · ·
▲+104▼
How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
Tentacles!
3276 votes · ·
▲+94▼
Knock knock.
Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? I didn't know you could yodel!
2074 votes · ·
▲+77▼
Why did Vladimir Putin fail all his tests in school?
Because he was always Russian!
617 votes · ·
▲+74▼
Where does the king keep his armies?
Up his sleevies
2454 votes · ·
▲+63▼
What would bears be without bees?
Ears!
1707 votes · ·
▲+59▼
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
4427 votes · ·
▲+28▼
What didn't the melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe!
2226 votes · ·
▲+25▼
Everyone asks where's Waldo…
Nobody ever asks *how's* Waldo.
1341 votes · ·
▲+14▼
What do you call karate for amputees?
Partial arts.
16 votes · ·
▲+14▼
What do you call someone who only read 12.5% of the Bible?
An eightheist.
20 votes · ·
▲+12▼
What did the teacher do with the student's cheese report?
She "grated" it!
2144 votes · ·

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