507 of The Most Divisive Jokes on the Internet | Good Bad Jokes

▲+750▼
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
1912 votes · ·
▲-974▼
I slept with a woman who cooked a ton of pasta last night.
She gave me carbs!
2008 votes · ·
▲-407▼
What does a Mexican put under his carpet?
Underlay! Underlay!
1799 votes · ·
▲+192▼
What kind of pictures do turtles take?
Shellfies!
1756 votes · ·
▲+494▼
I miss my umbilical cord.
I grew attached to it.
1814 votes · ·
▲+243▼
Why did the cookie cry?
Because his mother was a wafer so long!
1761 votes · ·
▲+259▼
What type of music do mummies listen to?
WRAP MUSIC!
1763 votes · ·
▲-481▼
Why do penguins walk softly?
Because they can't walk hardly.
1805 votes · ·
▲+186▼
Knock knock.
Who's there? To. To who? To *whom*
1749 votes · ·
▲+393▼
What did the mother Buffalo say when her boy left for college?
Bye Son!
1777 votes · ·
▲-236▼
What do you call an empty jar of cheese whiz?
Cheese Was!
1740 votes · ·
▲+349▼
How many ears does Spock have?
3. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear!
1753 votes · ·
▲+454▼
What does a vegan zombie eat?
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!!
1772 votes · ·
▲+63▼
What would bears be without bees?
Ears!
1707 votes · ·
▲-505▼
What's brown and sounds like a bell?
DUNGGGgggg
1775 votes · ·

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