503 of The Most Divisive Jokes on the Internet | Good Bad Jokes

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Two cows are standing in a field.
One cow says "MOOOOO!" The other cow says pretty much the same thing.
2539 votes · ·
▲+635▼
What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
2611 votes · ·
▲+563▼
What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. The Extra Testicle!
2571 votes · ·
▲+384▼
Two muffins were sitting in an oven.
One turned to the other and said "Hey, it's pretty hot in here, isn't it?" The other turned and shouted "Oh my god a talking muffin!"
2537 votes · ·
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Where do Volkswagens go when they get old?
The Old Volks home!
2520 votes · ·
▲-938▼
What do hillbillies drink out of?
Hiccups!
2652 votes · ·
▲+462▼
Why don't blind people go skydiving?
Because it scares their dogs too much.
2522 votes · ·
▲+122▼
Knock knock.
Who's there? Europe. Europe who? No *you're* a poo!
2482 votes · ·
▲+570▼
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener!
2540 votes · ·
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A horse walks into a bar.
Several patrons got up and left as they recognized the potential danger in the situation.
2479 votes · ·
▲+105▼
What's brown and rhymes with snoop?
Dr. Dre
2471 votes · ·
▲+917▼
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
You're too young to be smoking!
2625 votes · ·
▲+940▼
What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam.
2630 votes · ·
▲+72▼
Where does the king keep his armies?
Up his sleevies
2452 votes · ·
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Knock knock.
Who's there? Dwayne. Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub I'm dwowning!
2471 votes · ·

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