507 Top Rated Jokes — Voted Best by Our Readers | Good Bad Jokes

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How did the hipster burn his mouth?
He sipped his coffee before it was cool!
3686 votes · ·
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What's the difference between ignorance and Apathy?
I don't know and I don't care.
3538 votes · ·
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Does anyone need an ark?
I Noah guy.
3084 votes · ·
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Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot!
3409 votes · ·
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Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team?
Because she kept running from the ball!
3412 votes · ·
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Why should you not write with a dull pencil?
Because it's pointless.
3079 votes · ·
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What do we want?
LOW FLYING AIRPLANE NOISES! When do we want them? NNNEEEEEOOOOOWWWwwwwww…
3493 votes · ·
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I sold my vacuum the other day…
all it was doing was collecting dust!
3002 votes · ·
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Why does Waldo wear a striped shirt?
Because he doesn't want to be spotted!
2910 votes · ·
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Why do ghosts love elevators?
Because they lift their spirits!
3265 votes · ·
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What is a duck's favourite drug?
Quack!
2845 votes · ·
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And Jesus said, "Come forth and receive everlasting life!"
But John came fifth, and only received a toaster oven.
2360 votes · ·
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Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?
It runs in your jeans!
3504 votes · ·
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How do you feel when there is no coffee?
Depresso.
2447 votes · ·
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What did the Lion King tell Simba when he was walking too slow?
Mufasa!
3913 votes · ·

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