504 Most Voted On Jokes | Good Bad Jokes

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Doctor: “Sir, your test results show that your DNA is backwards.”
Patient: “AND?!”
1 vote · ·
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What do you call a pig who's lost his voice?
Disgruntled!
1 vote · ·
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I bought a dog from a locksmith.
As soon as we got home it made a bolt for the door!
1 vote · ·
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Opportunity.Opportunity who?
That's impossible, opportunity doesn't knock twice!
1 vote · ·
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Why did Chewbacca crash the Millennium Falcon the first time he flew it?
It was a Wookiee mistake!
1 vote · ·
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Why shouldn't you wear glasses when you play football?
Because it's a contact sport!
1 vote · ·
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Why can't you tell a kleptomaniac a joke?
Because they take everything, literally.
1 vote · ·
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What do you call a wizard that has run out of spells?
A was-ard!
1 vote · ·
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What do you call a skunk with a laser blaster?
Pepe le pew pew pew! (Sorry this joke stinks.)
1 vote · ·
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A woman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "what'll it be?" to which she replies, "I'll have a double entendre."
So he gave it to her.
1 vote · ·
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Knock knock.
Who's there?Murray.Murray who?
Murray Christmas!
1 vote · ·
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What's the clumsiest tower in the world?
The I Fell Tower!
1 vote · ·
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What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
They both have the same middle name!
1 vote · ·
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Why are dogs bad at dancing?
They have two left feet!
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So my wife challenged me to a game of strip poker, but it turns out she just wanted to do laundry.
So I folded.
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